Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation , such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money .Others argue that it is better to try and improve . Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
This IELTS Writing Task 2 answer was marked Band 8 on the four official criteria. All four criteria were marked at 8. The biggest single improvement: Support the broad claim "History also shows that progress" with one specific, relevant example and explain how it proves that active improvement is preferable.
How it was marked
| Criterion | Band | Why |
|---|---|---|
| Task Response | 8 | The essay addresses both views and presents a clear, consistent position that improvement is generally preferable, while acknowledging that acceptance may be sensible temporarily. Ideas are well developed through examples such as an employee who can "acquire new qualifications" and a person who can "take on extra work", although the claim that "History also shows that progress" is somewhat general rather than specifically supported. |
| Lexical Resource | 8 | Vocabulary is wide, precise, and appropriate for an academic discussion, with effective expressions including "mental well-being", "conserve their energy", "lasting sense of helplessness", and "settle for the status quo". There are no significant spelling or word-formation problems, although a few expressions could be made slightly more natural or precise. |
| Grammatical Range & Accuracy | 8 | The response demonstrates a broad range of accurate structures, including concessive clauses in "Although both views have merit", conditional reasoning in "if there is no alternative", and complex sentences with relative clauses such as "circumstances that cannot be changed". Errors are extremely rare; the main minor issue is the absence of a final full stop after "better future". |
| Coherence & Cohesion | 8 | The essay has a clear four-part progression: it introduces the debate, explains the case for acceptance, argues for improvement, and gives a balanced conclusion. Cohesive devices such as "Moreover", "However", "In my view", and "In conclusion" are used accurately and support the progression without causing confusion. |
The answer
A learner answer, not a model answer — study what the marks reward, don't copy it.
Facing hardship, such as a job one dislikes or a lack of money, people react in very different ways. While some argue that acceptance is the wisest response, others believe that effort to improve one’s circumstances is the better path. Although both views have merit, I largely side with the second.
Those who favour acceptance usually emphasise stability and mental well-being. Leaving an unsatisfying job without an alternative, for instance, could leave a family without any income, so tolerating the situation temporarily may be the responsible choice. Moreover, constantly struggling against circumstances that cannot be changed, such as a recession, can cause stress and frustration. Accepting reality in such cases allows people to conserve their energy and focus on what they can control.
However, I believe that passive acceptance is rarely a sound long-term strategy. Most difficult situations are at least partly within a person’s power to change. An employee who is unhappy at work can acquire new qualifications, seek a transfer, or apply elsewhere, while someone short of money can take on extra work or learn to budget more carefully. Without such initiative, a temporary problem may become a permanent one, and the person risks a lasting sense of helplessness. History also shows that progress, both personal and social, comes from people who refused to settle for the status quo.
In my view, the most sensible approach combines both ideas: people should accept the parts of a situation they cannot change, but actively work to improve the parts they can. This keeps them calm without making them complacent.
In conclusion, although accepting a bad situation can offer short-term security and peace of mind, taking action is generally more beneficial because it opens the way to a better future
Corrections from the marking
In conclusion, although accepting a bad situation can offer short-term security and peace of mind, taking action is generally more beneficial because it opens the way to a better future
In conclusion, although accepting a bad situation can offer short-term security and peace of mind, taking action is generally more beneficial because it opens the way to a better future.
A complete essay sentence should end with a full stop.
How this answer could score higher
- Support the broad claim "History also shows that progress" with one specific, relevant example and explain how it proves that active improvement is preferable.
- Use slightly more natural and formal collocations by changing "effort to improve" to "making an effort to improve" and "someone short of money" to "someone experiencing financial hardship".
- Maintain complete punctuation by adding a full stop after "opens the way to a better future", and make the conclusion explicitly connect its general principle to the job and financial examples.
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